If you like comedy, PR or the occasional inside scoop on the entertainment world, then drop by for a daily dose written by me, Kambri Crews, producer and publicist to comedians and more!   Tuesday, May 31, 2005 To Do Tonight Check out the always original and hilarious Andres du Bouchet as "Francisco Guglioni" host of Giant Tuesday Night of Amazing Inventions & Also There is a Game!!! --Kambri Link - 3:01 PM -   Thursday, May 26, 2005 Live For Today - Live & In Person Christian will appear with Rachel Harris & Paul Scheer on the Today Show tomorrow at 7:40 AM. If you read today's NY Post, you'll see a spread about "indie" comedy which features some quotable quotes by Christian with his pic on the internet version. Unfortunately, they give the wrong credit for the photo, but I'm not too miffed by it. --Kambri Link - 10:33 AM -   Tuesday, May 24, 2005 You're Absolutely NOT Hired Verbatim email response to my Craig's List ad: I'll do it if you still need it Hmmm...I'm not sure if this is in response to my inquiry for a really submissive guy or my request to play with gorilla poop together. Oops, silly me, it's my ad for a graphic design intern. So I guess I should retract that email I sent in reply, "If you agree to this, just send me an email that says 'Yes.' I want you badly, and I know you want me, but you have to be with Betsy, too." --Kambri On second thought... Link - 12:01 AM -   Monday, May 23, 2005 Live For Today Over the past weeks, the Today Show has been helping people "Live for Today" by fulfilling wishes on their life's To Do List. Back when I was getting divorced -- What? I never told you I was once married? Oops, yeah, I was married once. -- In true Texas trailer trash fashion I married at 17 years of age. Six years later, I found myself determined to "Live for Today" and made a break for it. I compiled my own list titled "To Do Before I Die" (Clever, yes?) and set out to experience life on my own. Having just moved, I purged lots of old books, journals, letters and pictures that simply don't mean anything to me anymore. I came across this list and was tempted to throw it out -- it was silly and some of my items were downright embarrassing. In looking closer, though, I was pretty astounded at the things listed and how mundane and simple some of them are. Ride a train, eat sushi, see a parade -- check, check, check. Growing up the way I had, being responsible for myself, working full time at such a young age, having inexperienced and unwordly people around me I simply hadn't done anything. See a Broadway play, learn to golf, go to Europe, vote, ride the subway, have my hair styled, handcraft pottery, learn to bike, go on a cruise, picnic, ice skate. Check, check, check, check, check, check, check, check, check, check, check. I'm really proud of having broken free and carved out a pretty interesting, varied life for myself, and yet there's still quite a bit of regular old stuff on this list I have not done. Get a pedicure, drive across the U.S., build a snowman, participate in a rally, ride a camel, visit the Grand Canyon, go to the circus, go sled riding, be fully self-employed. Time to "get busy living or get busy dying." --Kambri What's on your list? Link - 10:21 AM -   Thursday, May 19, 2005 Revenge of the Sith & FLIcK Magazine With the premiere of Revenge of the Sith, came the launch of FLIcK Magazine with a column by none other than Christian Finnegan. Pick up your *free* copy at any Loews, Cinemark or Carmike Cinemas or avoid the geek scene altogether by downloading the whole darn thing here. Don't want to sift through the whole thing? Well, I'm all about choice, so here's another option: get only Christian's contribution by clicking here. --Kambri Link - 4:26 PM -   Wednesday, May 18, 2005 I Didn't Do It, I Swear! I just got this call from my receptionist, "Kambri, the police are here to see you. Can you come up to the front, please?" Now, even though I knew deep down it was with regard to a case I'm working on, I still had a flurry of thoughts of what I could possibly have done wrong. "That was a dream wasn't it? I didn't really chop up a body, wrap it in trashbags and bury it under my hardwood floor under my bed, right?" They were here for the case. The body is still safely hidden away. And, anyway, I watch way too much Autopsy and Forensic Files to be so stupid as to keep a body in my home no matter how well wrapped and buried it is. --Kambri Or to chop one up. You know how much blood that would generate?!? Link - 4:11 PM -   Friday, May 13, 2005 My Lucky Day? I walked under some scaffolding after much inner dialogue telling me to go cross the street and then re-cross the street after I passed it. Sure enough, CLANG! A giant silver wrench fell from the sky and landed directly in front of me, narrowly missing my big toe. And my HEAD. Then a big bolt fell then I ran. Whew! Close call. This is the second time in New York I have avoided a falling piece of deadly metal. The first was 9/11/02. I recounted the story and someone said "And on Friday the 13th!" So I guess this day isn't so unlucky for me. Oof, This Kid's Gonna Kill His Dad! Eric McCormack was quoted in US Weekly this week (Hey, I get it because my clients write the Fashion Police, okay?!) talking about his 2.5 year old son, Finnigan. Behold, a reason for an Oedipus Complex: He's into finger-painting recently...and he was naked, running around and the finger paints were out...I looked away for a second and looked back and he was...painting his willy the way a woman would paint her nails, very, very delicate...He looked up and went, "Pink!" --Kambri Link - 4:16 PM -   Thursday, May 12, 2005 ARGH!!!! How is it that so many people in charge of receiving and evaluating sponsorship and marketing requests simply don't reply? At all. Ever. Even if the answer is "no thanks," please have the courtesy of a reply. It's the same beef I have with the whole RSVP thing except this is actually what the offenders get paid to do. I just want some free condoms, okay! --Kambri Anyone? Link - 5:00 PM -   Monday, May 09, 2005 But What About the Dog? Unbelievable story out of Nairobi from the AP. "A nursing dog foraging for food for its puppies retrieved an abandoned baby girl in a forest in Kenya and carried the infant to its litter, witnesses said yesterday. The stray dog carried the infant across a busy road and a barbed wire fence in a poor neighbourhood near the Ngong Forests in the capital, Nairobi. The dog apparently found the baby on Friday in the plastic bag in which the infant had been abandoned, said Aggrey Mwalimu, owner of the compound where the animal is now living. It was unclear how the baby survived in the bag without suffocating. Doctors said that the baby had been abandoned about two days before the dog discovered her. Medical workers later found maggots in the infant's umbilical cord, a product of days of neglect, Hannah Gakuo, the spokeswoman of the Kenyatta National Hospital, where the girl was taken for treatment, said yesterday. No one has yet claimed the baby, she said." Donations are pouring in for the baby, but what about the dog? Who's taking care of her and her babies? Mary Adhiambo has been quoted as the owner of the dog, but Mary didn't bother naming the mutt and the poor mutt was foraging for food. It was just today that I revised my beneficiary on my legal documentation to be the ASPCA. I figure they've been around for 138 years (!), they're likely to be around to make use of my money and eliminate at least one story of a poor animal suffering. --Kambri Paquita has a clause, too! Link - 8:18 PM -   Sunday, May 08, 2005 Ballyhoo Promotions Newsletter Read the latest Ballyhoo. --Kambri Good stuff. Link - 3:32 PM -   Wednesday, May 04, 2005 Wanna Laugh? Click here then scroll down to the 2nd to last video titled: Sheryl Underwood Has A Crush! Here's the description: "Sheryl Underwood has something to say to Christian Finnegan. And he has a reply." His reply will stick with me always. --Kambri ALWAYS! Link - 6:03 AM -   Tuesday, May 03, 2005 I attended the closing of Barry Katz's Boston Comedy Club last night which was followed by a roast of sorts. In his "set," Ben Bailey said, "I made out with Sarah Silverman on this stage." Host Rich Vos returned to the podium and snarked, "Sure, you made out with Sarah Silverman ... right after she sucked my cock." Ben retorted, "I thought I tasted hack." The roof came off the place! Drunk Dialing 311 On the way home, I drunk dialed 311 to report a guy in a yellow Hummer driving while talking on his cell phone. Leon, the 311 operator, said they wouldn't do anything unless the offender was endangering other people. "His driving a HUMMER, Leon! Do you know how much fuel that uses? That's endangering all of our lives," I slurred. Christian recorded it on his new phone/blackberry thingy and played it back for me later. I wasted NYC resources. I'm sorry. But if you see a ridiculous yellow Hummer with the license plate DBB 2520, citizen arrest that jackass. --Kambri Hummers are ridiculous. Link - 10:14 AM -   Monday, May 02, 2005 Great Show Tomorrow TUESDAY, MAY 3RD - SOB STORIES: LET'S GET PHYSICAL! PSNBC presents Sob Stories. Christian Finnegan (VH1's Best Week Ever, Chappelle's Show), hosts guest comedians as they recount physical feats of derring do: power lifting, all-night boozers, mountain climbing, hot dog binges...they suffered bodily harm so you don't have to. The Marquee Theater 356 Bowery (btwn E. 3rd & E. 4th) Doors open at 7:30; Show starts at 8:00 Only $5.00 and NO drink minimum! This month's guests are Seth Morris (UCB Theatre, The Marijuanalogues) , Tom Shillue (Conan, Comedy Central Presents), Matt Goldich (downtown favorite!) and Allison Silverman (writer for Late Night with Conan O'Brien). --Kambri Link - 10:54 AM -